Birth Announcement February 05, 2004 - 5:42 a.m.

The expecting parents couldn't hide their anxiety very well. She was obviously stressing and making a list so that she wouldn't forget anything, and to probably help distract herself from further worries. And he was strangely quiet most of the time, which is strange indeed for a typically babbling ADHD nut. You could read 'nervous' all over his face though he mostly denied it. There were occasions when no one else was around that he would admit it. Neither of them didn't even get a full hours sleep that night.

I, amazingly, had four. Which was a record for the week.

We went in and her room was ready around eight in the morning. I'd say it was within the hour that they set her up on the inducement IV and broke her water. At which point she kept looking over at me with a 'this is completely disgusting' look on her face. Also saying 'this is completely disgusting'. They let the meds circulate and the contractions build up a bit, but they didn't get bad at all. It was pretty cool being able to watch the contractions on a monitor. By the time they came in to do the epidural, which was probably a little after noon, she had only winced a few times from contractions and cried once. The one time she cryed was actually because the blood pressure band was on too tight and squeezing the crap out of her arm - every 30 minutes. They adjusted it so it was less painful. Less, not completely.

They asked me to leave for the epidural and I was probably gone for an hour when the student nurse found me sitting in the hallway and said it was okay to go back. By then, the monitor showed she was having major contractions. Before I left, they barely went over 20 with minimal rises and falls on the line. When I got back, the line looked like mountains peaking around 60 and 80. We were constanly saying things like 'Oh, look, you're having a major contraction right now' And she would say something like 'Yeah, it looks painful'.

Whenever I have kids, I'm having an epidural. Screw natural childbirth.

Most of the day, it was just her Chris (not mine) and myself, with her of course, and the nurse coming in at random to check on her or help her move around. So it stayed really quiet for the most part. We had the TV set on random sitcoms just for something to watch then later put it on Cartoon Network. Appropriate childbirth viewing. I was able to nap for a few minutes here and there, but that was more than the mother. Every time she would start to fall asleep, someone would come in or she would get uncomfortable or worrying about the baby's heart rate.

Most of the morning, her heart rate was staying low with random plummits that seemed to fix themselves. There would be times that it stayed low for too long and the nurse would rush in to rearrange Becky, hoping that would help, and put her on oxygen until it was steady again. So it's hard to sleep when you're worried about that. Also, it didn't help when his grandmother came in briefly and took him out into the hallway to ask when he was going to get a paternity test. Most of his family is doubting that the kid is even his, and won't buy him anything for her until he finds out for sure.

Okay, it's fine to have your doubts for whatever reason. I completely understand that you have no idea what kind of intentions other people may have and how they may act behind your back, so doubt is normal. But to bring it up right there, during the labor, is completely uncalled for and plain rude. Show some fucking tact. To make matters worse, she called the room later to talk to his mom, I guess, who had just shown up with his dad and brother, and when Becky answered the phone she was asking her things like 'are you even pregnant?' What the hell?? You fucking idiot! No, she was accidentally put in the labor and delivery unit with all the IVs and crap. Or better yet, she paid someone for use of the room so she could really trick his family. And as soon as the phone was passed to his mom, it was obvious that she was still going on about it. That's just horrible.

It wasn't much longer after that, that his dad decided he wanted to read the paper and turned the light on. Right when she was starting to fall asleep. It was right around that point that the baby's heart rate started dropping again. So that was it... she started crying. She was exhausted, hungry, and stressed. Not only did she have normal delivery and mother concerns but she was worried about the dropping heart rate and now had to contend with his family being dicks on such an important day. Luckily for her, it wasn't long before the computer alerted the nurse to the prolonged slump in Hallie's heart rate, so she came in and said two of the people had to leave. Since they came in together, all three ended up leaving. Then it went back to being nice and quiet and Becky could vent without feeling guilty or bitchy.

Some time after that, the nurse came in to check her cervix and said she'd finally gotten to 6cm dilation. She'd stayed at three almost all day. This was the only time I got at all queasy, and I blame that on the sight of blood. There was a little bit of blood earlier, but this was during a clean up so there were several towels and gloves that were being changed, in addition to the idea of a gaping, bloody hole. Not even picturing the fact that it's an intended orifice, just that it was a bleeding cavity. It wasn't enough queasiness to make me want to vomit or pass out, just enough to make me feel unsettled. So that was cool.

Finally around 6:30 that evening when she had two more visitors, the baby's heart rate dropped significantly and was staying between 60 and 80, and not wanting to go back up. It's supposed to be around 150. In no time at all, two nurses rushed in there and said everyone but the Support (aka - Dad) had to leave. I went into the waiting room and her other visitors went elsewhere.

I was in there for forty-five minutes, an hour tops, when a nurse came to get me. It might have only been a half hour, for all I know. I figured they'd either finally gotten her heart rate stabilized, or I was expecting the worst. Something bad happened and she needed some emotional support. But the nurse said she already had her.

What?! That quickly? Was she okay??

These are the questions I actually remember asking.

So I ran into the room to meet Hallie Elizabeth Lee. Born at 6:47pm on Tuesday February 3rd, 2004. 5 lbs. 14 oz. and 18 3/4 inches long. She had black curly hair and blue eyes, but that often changes, and wide duck feet. Born during an episode of DragonBall - one of the Dad's favorite cartoons - and on Becky and her husband's four year wedding anniversary.

Apparently when the nurses rushed in there, they thought they were going to have to do something very drastic and went to check her and found that Hallie's head was right there, ready to be pushed out. In about a half hour, she had gone from 6 to 10cm and ready to push. In less than fifteen minutes later, after setting things up and getting the doctor in there, she gave three or four pushes and she was out. A horribly simple delivery, and she only needed two stitches afterwards, not counting the 'husbandry stitch'.

I was so used to seeing pictures of newborns and seeing them all wrinkly and not at all attractive. That wasn't the case with Hallie. Her skin was completely smooth and soft and she had great colour to her. She didn't cry a whole lot, mostly fussed here and there. And she was constantly keeping her eyes open. Which I also found odd because I've understood that newborns keep them shut for the most part. But she looked like a normal person struggling to stay awake. They were mainly open, but with a whole lot of heavy blinking. She was actually very cute and not smooshed or deformed like some infants often are. She had one little line on her head where she headbutt her mom on the way out, but that was gone by today. If astrological traits hold any truth, she'll be like I was and be very easy to take care of. Give her some toys and her own space and she'll be content for hours. By the time I was three or four months old, I learned how to take my own dirty diapers off, because I obviously didn't care for sitting in my own mess much. And given the crying fit she had simply because she peed today, she'll be much the same way. Probably make for easier potty training.

Over all, Becky's had a very lucky pregnancy. She's only gained 10 pounds and aside from occasional movement, she didn't have to really worry about any pains or major kicking until the last month. And she complained about that being almost unbearable, but I guarantee other pregant mothers had to contend with much worse. If she got off easy for the rest of the pregnancy, I'm guessing her last month was still a breeze compared to what others have gone through. And her labor, though worrisome at times, was made simple due to the epidural. Her delivery was so easy, it was over before she knew it. I've seen dozens of pictures of the mother immediately after giving birth, and they looked completely wiped out. But she looked like she was wide awake and fully coherent. She was sitting up as best she could and wiggling her toes and feet as often as she could, simply because she was finally able to again. The minute they took her up to her room, she started eating and devoured a whole thing of mashed potatoes, fourth if not half of a roasted chicken, and several cookies. By today, she felt like a train wreck and was demanding her next percocet, but that's to be expected. All in all, I think she had it very easy.

She's being released tomorrow morning - in about five hours, actually - and has already been given the okay to drive and resume everything as normal. We haven't actually decided yet, but in the next week or two I'll be going to stay with her for a little while to help her get fully comfortable with things. Plus she'll need someone around when she's going through the baby blues, and definitely if she suffers from postpartum depression,

I was there for everything but the epidural and the very brief delivery, and I was the first person not physically involved to see her, so of course I'm going to help take care of her whenever I can.

Angel's 100th episode was on tonight.

I.... uh.... well... um... err...

Wow.

And I can't help but think that maybe the head honchos at Wolfram and Hart - or maybe some other source? - were just screwing with Angel to get him motivated for something else that's to come.

I cried. Actually, I think I cried more during this episode than I did during Anya's speech in The Body or Willow's breakdown in Grave.

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